When the topic of bad habits comes up, it’s understandable if your mind immediately goes to things like smoking cigarettes or always showing up late to work. But the reality is that there are also bad habits that can transpire in a relationship—ones that can ultimately be the cause of its demise.
Whether you’re in a relationship now and you want to preserve and protect it as much as possible or you find yourself constantly in and out of them and you’re wondering how you can do better, the next time, here are some really (REALLY) bad relationship habits to avoid.
1. Lying
A liar tends to be someone who is scared of the truth. The problem with that is if there isn’t a lot of truth in the relationship, you don’t have much of a foundation to build upon. Lying is for cowards. Don’t do it. And definitely don’t tolerate it.
2. Disloyalty
Once you and your boyfriend have established certain boundaries, it’s important that you both respect them. For instance, if you’ve decided to not see other people, it would be disloyal to do otherwise. This includes dating someone else or even flirting with someone else. Basically this is where the Golden Rule of “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” should apply.
3. Constant fighting
If you’re constantly fighting (and by that we mean arguing because hopefully everyone is keeping their hands to themselves), there’s nothing healthy about that. Step back and ask yourself what the root issue is. Then try to resolve it. If that seems close to impossible, for the sake of your emotional well-being, it might be best to bring the relationship to an end.
4. Fighting online
Have you ever watched a couple fight online? If you’re anything like us, the first thing we usually think is “Don’t you two have each other’s phone numbers?” The second is “This looks so silly.” Every couple has their rough days. That doesn’t mean that virtually everyone in cyberspace has to know about it though.
5. Abuse
The first time a man causes you to get into the position this woman is in, that’s the time to make your exit. For good.
6. Nagging
You’re not your guy’s mother. You’re his girlfriend. It’s one thing to make a request or to remind him of something that you think he may have forgotten. It’s something else to take it upon yourself to talk about it over…and over…and over…and over…and over—you get it.
7. Passive aggressiveness
Wanna know something that drives a lot of men up the wall? Them asking their girlfriend what’s wrong when they clearly see that something is up and her response being “nothing” when it’s something. That’s why we thought it would be a good idea to include the definitions of passive aggressiveness. If you see any of this in you or the people you attract, it’s unhealthy. Just sayin’.
8. Being totally financially dependent on each other
Until you are married, your bills are not one another’s responsibilities. So, if you have yourself in a position—rather a predicament—where there is totally financial dependency, sooner or later, you’re going to regret it. BIG TIME.
9. Using sex to “fix” problems
Sex is a way to express love. It shouldn’t be a “fix” for problems. If when things are bad, all the two of you do is resort to sex, it’s not going to be the glue that holds you together for long. In fact, you might want to go without sex for a while to see what else you two have in common.
10. Not listening
You can’t communicate if you’re not listening to one another. And if you’re not communicating, your relationship will never really grow. Over and out.
11. Comparing to other people
He’s an individual. You’re an individual. Chances are you both had pasts and individual past interests. It’s an insult to what you have now to be trying to compare it to the past or other people. It’s a nasty and insecure habit. Break it.
12. Jealousy
Yeah, this picture is cute but nothing really good, lasting or beneficial has ever come from jealousy. Just a lot of pain. Oh, and plenty of drama.
13. Not letting each other have friendships
You can be your guy’s best friend (perhaps), but that shouldn’t mean that you should expect to be his only friend. He’s in a relationship, not in jail. Do your best to give him the freedom to have other friendships. It’s good for him and ultimately your relationship too.
14. Possessiveness
See how psycho she looks in this picture? That’s how all possessive people look. Keep the crazy down to a minimum. He’s not a piece of property. He’s an individual.
15. Impatience
Wouldn’t life be awesome if everything happened the way you want, at the time you want? Reality check: that’s not how things operate. If he said he’ll call you back, give him a minute. If he said he can’t make it over this weekend because he has to work, be understanding. Good things come to those who wait, remember? Words to live by.
16. Being demanding
Demanding to get your way is basically throwing a temper tantrum. That’s what children do. Enough said.
